Monday, November 27, 2006

How to drive in the fog...

Main Man and I came across some thick fog this evening on our way home. I'm a pretty experienced driver-in-the-fog, so I thought I'd share some tips with y'all about how to handle this potentially dangerous situation:

1. Always lean forward in your seat, as close to the windshield as possible. You'll see the road WAY better this way.

2. Squint your eyes and frown. This will let the car know you're taking this fog seriously.

3. Stop talking, and turn down the radio. It's important to hear the fog.

4. Comment on how thick the fog is at least 3 times in a row; throw in a "wow" or two for good measure.

5. Comment on what the fog probably indicates about tomorrow's weather. This is extremely important.

That should cover it. Drive safely, my friends!

7 Comments:

Blogger Just Spence said...

another important step is to try to recollect the last time you drove in fog so thick as this. then contextualize. go into full anecdote mode. then, when your passenger starts unwillingly participating in what is likely to be a pretty dull story, interrupt with "SHHHHHH! i'm concentrating."

November 28, 2006 9:58 AM  
Blogger Berry said...

Oooh yes... good one. Terribly important. I also should mention how crucial it is to use the "pea soup" comparison at least once.

November 28, 2006 10:22 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

LOL -

Oh, Oh, and don't forget to turn on your lights, then turn them off and on again to try and figure out which is better.

on
off
on

You crack me up berry!!!
marie
(yes, we even get fog in southern california. oh, oh, and I wont be wearing those furry booots, so you can rest easy!)

November 28, 2006 1:28 PM  
Blogger Berry said...

Yes, excellent point, Marie. Main Man did flick his high-beams on a few times, just to verify that it is indeed worse to use high-beams in fog (we were driving in the evening, when it was already dark).

November 28, 2006 2:04 PM  
Blogger Dale said...

Always listen for Adrienne Barbeau's voice to draw you through the fog. It's foggy like you wouldn't believe here today too. What's up with that?

November 28, 2006 9:04 PM  
Blogger Berry said...

Dale, I believe you meant to say: "like pea soup".

November 28, 2006 9:32 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I got caught in some terrifying fog driving in unfamiliar territory on our election night. Yee-ikes. Could have used thos advice then, although I did sit forwrd. Repeating "oh fuck omigod where the hell am I" seemed to help too.

November 29, 2006 12:30 AM  

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