Calling all DINKs
Remember that acronym? It was popularized during the Yuppie era. It means "double income, no kids".
There was a time, it seems, when every other couple was a Dink. Or maybe it just appeared that way, because I wasn't actually looking out for any at the time.
Thing is, it's really, really, difficult to get a social life going when you're 40 with no kids. Take our summer at the golf club, for example. Main Man and I were there every day this season, except for the few precious weeks that Step Son was here. We haven't been living in this area long, and thought the club would offer all kinds of opportunities to meet people and develop a circle of friends.
Problem is, everyone else who has the time to play golf like we do are either retired, or in their early 20's. Those in our age group are busy with their kids. (If Step-Son could be living here with us, or at least if he could visit more often, it'd be a whole different story, obviously).
We spent so many years trying to have kids, that the circle of friends we developed were couples going through the same fertility hell. The difference now, of course, is that every single one of them was eventually successful, and many of them are on their 2nd or 3rd kid by now. That leaves them with very little time to socialize with us, naturally.
So now we need to make new friends; friends like us. It's not that we're anti-family. It's just that we don't fit in. And besides, it'd be nice to socialize with people who have as flexible a schedule as we do. Only, we don't know where to find them. Where the hell are these Dinks? What do they do with their time?
If we had kids, we'd be meeting up with other parents all the time! Through daycare... playgroups... school functions... our kids' friends... on the playground... yadda yadda.
We work for ourselves, so finding friends at work isn't gonna happen. Are we really gonna have to wait until we retire to find friends in the same "place" as us? Christ... that's a long way away.
So yooooooooo-hoooooooo!!! Those of you in our age group with no kids (and who aren't gonna have any)... where the hell ARE you?? Where's your secret hang-out? Come out and play!
There was a time, it seems, when every other couple was a Dink. Or maybe it just appeared that way, because I wasn't actually looking out for any at the time.
Thing is, it's really, really, difficult to get a social life going when you're 40 with no kids. Take our summer at the golf club, for example. Main Man and I were there every day this season, except for the few precious weeks that Step Son was here. We haven't been living in this area long, and thought the club would offer all kinds of opportunities to meet people and develop a circle of friends.
Problem is, everyone else who has the time to play golf like we do are either retired, or in their early 20's. Those in our age group are busy with their kids. (If Step-Son could be living here with us, or at least if he could visit more often, it'd be a whole different story, obviously).
We spent so many years trying to have kids, that the circle of friends we developed were couples going through the same fertility hell. The difference now, of course, is that every single one of them was eventually successful, and many of them are on their 2nd or 3rd kid by now. That leaves them with very little time to socialize with us, naturally.
So now we need to make new friends; friends like us. It's not that we're anti-family. It's just that we don't fit in. And besides, it'd be nice to socialize with people who have as flexible a schedule as we do. Only, we don't know where to find them. Where the hell are these Dinks? What do they do with their time?
If we had kids, we'd be meeting up with other parents all the time! Through daycare... playgroups... school functions... our kids' friends... on the playground... yadda yadda.
We work for ourselves, so finding friends at work isn't gonna happen. Are we really gonna have to wait until we retire to find friends in the same "place" as us? Christ... that's a long way away.
So yooooooooo-hoooooooo!!! Those of you in our age group with no kids (and who aren't gonna have any)... where the hell ARE you?? Where's your secret hang-out? Come out and play!
posted by Berry at 10:21 AM
10 Comments:
They're all stuck inside reading PEOPLE.
You know what...? You may be absolutely right!!
We have the opposite problem. All of our friends are dinks and we are the only set of parents. We are almost too busy to notice we do nothing social anymore. Maybe we should switch places for a while?
We have the opposite problem. All of our friends are dinks and we are the only set of parents. We are almost too busy to notice we do nothing social anymore. Maybe we should switch places for a while?
I don't know what you'd call us because we were DINKs, then SINKs, and now we're expecting the first babby in June. But I completely understand your position...A lot of our friends are older (read, in their 60s, retired, kids grown up) and they have the same flexibility we do...Although sometimes you want people in your own age group...
Em, tell your dinks to call us!
Tanya, Congrats! So, this means you will go from dink to sink to si(one)k. Way to go!
our dilemma is this: we have become parents, and the rest of our friends still live with theirs....
We're in the same boat as Em--while many of our friends are parents, I miss our friends who are DINKS because it's just so hard to get together with them anymore. It seems like while we have parent friends, eerryoneI really like are DINKS or singletons.
Okay... so now at least I know they're out there somewhere; they really do exist.
(Holy crap... do you think it's me?? Am I repelling the dinks? But I thought that with all this charm and brilliance... ?)
no, of course not! i mean, we're talking about dinks here. i think the situation is pretty self-explanatory. cleary, the problem is with them.
Post a Comment
<< Home