Design glitch
I've just had a dramatic experience involving my first sip of coffee for the day... and my wind pipe.
My morning coffee is always accompanied by a certain level of eagerness and anticipation. I LOVE my morning coffee (even though it's decaf). It's because of this love that I tend to turn my first sip into a giant, slobbering gulp. Not a slurp.... slurping irritates me.... but definitely a slobbering gulp.
This morning, I sat down in my office in front of my computer with coffee in hand. This is my usual "first sip" spot. I open Outlook, and while it downloads eleventeen-thousand spam messages, I sip my coffee.
I must have gotten my body commands wrong today, because instead of sending the "swallow" command to my throat, I accidentally sent the "inhale deeply" command to my lungs.
And this is where all hell broke loose.
I suddenly find myself with a significant amount of coffee making its way down my air pipe, and thanks to the "giant first gulp" ritual, I also have a rather significant amount of coffee still in my mouth, with nowhere to go.
I urgently need to cough, and I need to do it now. But I'm sitting in front of my computer, so that won't do. I stand up quickly, sending my wheeled chair flying behind me. I frantically look around. There's nowhere for me to safely cough a mouthful of coffee without spraying some form of expensive electronic stuff. (In hindsight, I did have a very handy coffee cup RIGHT THERE in my hand, but it never occurred to me to use it).
I decide that my only hope is to make a mad dash for the bathroom, which is really only about 10 feet away. Completely do-able. Once inside the bathroom doorway, I catch sight of the sink (about 3 feet away) and feel that I have made it. So I cough. A lot. Mind you, there was still 3 feet between me and the sink.
So this morning, before my morning coffee (!!!), I had to clean the bathroom. On a Sunday. That ticked me off, and got me thinking that I'd like to have someone to blame for this. (It certainly wasn't my fault).
And then it occurred to me: Why the hell are we designed like this anyway?? It doesn't make sense. It's like a cruel joke. Putting the wind pipe so close to the esophagus?... and to have everything coming in from the same gate?... it's madness!! I think that whoever's in charge of the next evolutionary phase should give this some careful thought. We need a new design.
... and I need a fresh cup of coffee.
My morning coffee is always accompanied by a certain level of eagerness and anticipation. I LOVE my morning coffee (even though it's decaf). It's because of this love that I tend to turn my first sip into a giant, slobbering gulp. Not a slurp.... slurping irritates me.... but definitely a slobbering gulp.
This morning, I sat down in my office in front of my computer with coffee in hand. This is my usual "first sip" spot. I open Outlook, and while it downloads eleventeen-thousand spam messages, I sip my coffee.
I must have gotten my body commands wrong today, because instead of sending the "swallow" command to my throat, I accidentally sent the "inhale deeply" command to my lungs.
And this is where all hell broke loose.
I suddenly find myself with a significant amount of coffee making its way down my air pipe, and thanks to the "giant first gulp" ritual, I also have a rather significant amount of coffee still in my mouth, with nowhere to go.
I urgently need to cough, and I need to do it now. But I'm sitting in front of my computer, so that won't do. I stand up quickly, sending my wheeled chair flying behind me. I frantically look around. There's nowhere for me to safely cough a mouthful of coffee without spraying some form of expensive electronic stuff. (In hindsight, I did have a very handy coffee cup RIGHT THERE in my hand, but it never occurred to me to use it).
I decide that my only hope is to make a mad dash for the bathroom, which is really only about 10 feet away. Completely do-able. Once inside the bathroom doorway, I catch sight of the sink (about 3 feet away) and feel that I have made it. So I cough. A lot. Mind you, there was still 3 feet between me and the sink.
So this morning, before my morning coffee (!!!), I had to clean the bathroom. On a Sunday. That ticked me off, and got me thinking that I'd like to have someone to blame for this. (It certainly wasn't my fault).
And then it occurred to me: Why the hell are we designed like this anyway?? It doesn't make sense. It's like a cruel joke. Putting the wind pipe so close to the esophagus?... and to have everything coming in from the same gate?... it's madness!! I think that whoever's in charge of the next evolutionary phase should give this some careful thought. We need a new design.
... and I need a fresh cup of coffee.
posted by Berry at 8:59 AM
2 Comments:
LMAO okay that sucks. Hard. Do you know what would help? A Green Straw. No really. After having a bunch of scary things like that happen I now drink iced coffee from a straw. Now I just have to worry about poking my eye out.
Hope your Sunday gets better. No more cleaning and you definitely need an extra coffee...
I had a strawberry Coolatta incident myself over the weekend. All participants were side-lined because of it on Saturday night.
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