When Berries go bad
I behaved badly yesterday on my return flight home, and I am deeply ashamed. I guess I was tired. Or something.
It's just that... well, I had spent the last several days at my in-laws', and that'll drive a girl to behave the way I did, even under the best of circumstances. Or at least, that's the excuse I'm comfortable with.
And it's not like I went looking for trouble. She started it.
When the seatbelt light went off, I stood up and reached for my bag in the overhead compartment. That's when she plowed into me. I don't mean that I was accidentally nudged from the back. I was mowed down.
We had been sitting in the aisle seats across from each other, near the front of the plane (immediately behind the 1st Class section). She was a small middle-aged woman with a perma-grump face, wearing severe-looking glasses perched on the end of her nose, and she had decided that she was getting off the plane before everyone else.
Naturally, she could only get so far in the aisle before having to stand in line behind the VIP's. When I straightened myself up after having been launched face-first into my seat, I grabbed my overhead bag and went to stand immediately behind her.
I felt indignant and upset, and so naturally, I dealt with it by being maturely and appropriately passive-aggressive.
She couldn't have been more than 5'3". With my 2" heel boots, I am 6'. I held my carry-on bag firmly in front of me, and walked directly towards her. I kept walking until I was a little too close to her... just enough to cause my bag to press in between her shoulder blades.
I know... it's silly, really.
She turned to look at me, came face-to-face with my boobs, and then looked up. I didn't budge. I just stood there, looking straight ahead. She didn't say a word, and turned back around. I kept pressing.
The line moved ahead a couple of inches. I followed, and I kept pressing. Still, she said nothing.
I finally let go of the whole thing when I left the plane. I told Main Man what I had just done, and that I felt mean and ashamed. He did a "you didn't!" face, and then laughed it off.
I don't know if I managed to get a message through to the woman, or even what that message might have been. But I do know that it felt really good to behave that way at the time, and that when I wear 2" heels, I seem to be able to get away with a lot.
However, payback arrived for me today in the form of a painful blister, compliments of my boots.
That'll teach me.
It's just that... well, I had spent the last several days at my in-laws', and that'll drive a girl to behave the way I did, even under the best of circumstances. Or at least, that's the excuse I'm comfortable with.
And it's not like I went looking for trouble. She started it.
When the seatbelt light went off, I stood up and reached for my bag in the overhead compartment. That's when she plowed into me. I don't mean that I was accidentally nudged from the back. I was mowed down.
We had been sitting in the aisle seats across from each other, near the front of the plane (immediately behind the 1st Class section). She was a small middle-aged woman with a perma-grump face, wearing severe-looking glasses perched on the end of her nose, and she had decided that she was getting off the plane before everyone else.
Naturally, she could only get so far in the aisle before having to stand in line behind the VIP's. When I straightened myself up after having been launched face-first into my seat, I grabbed my overhead bag and went to stand immediately behind her.
I felt indignant and upset, and so naturally, I dealt with it by being maturely and appropriately passive-aggressive.
She couldn't have been more than 5'3". With my 2" heel boots, I am 6'. I held my carry-on bag firmly in front of me, and walked directly towards her. I kept walking until I was a little too close to her... just enough to cause my bag to press in between her shoulder blades.
I know... it's silly, really.
She turned to look at me, came face-to-face with my boobs, and then looked up. I didn't budge. I just stood there, looking straight ahead. She didn't say a word, and turned back around. I kept pressing.
The line moved ahead a couple of inches. I followed, and I kept pressing. Still, she said nothing.
I finally let go of the whole thing when I left the plane. I told Main Man what I had just done, and that I felt mean and ashamed. He did a "you didn't!" face, and then laughed it off.
I don't know if I managed to get a message through to the woman, or even what that message might have been. But I do know that it felt really good to behave that way at the time, and that when I wear 2" heels, I seem to be able to get away with a lot.
However, payback arrived for me today in the form of a painful blister, compliments of my boots.
That'll teach me.
posted by Berry at 11:10 AM
4 Comments:
I love that you're so tall! Well done!
And you know, every day in your life you're accommodating and kind to everyone around you, you're putting up with nonsense and tolerating all the stupidities everyone tosses in your direction, so I agree and support your mashing of the dwarf in front of you on the plane...(well, I am only assuming you're a kind person, maybe you're really an ogre?) :)
Yes, I am an exceptionally kind person. Small woodland birds and animals flock towards me when I sing. It comes with the height.
Aw, what nice! The little animals come to you, and then you kick them away!
hahaha! (keeding, I'm keeding! Don't hurt me!)
:)
Good going, next time use a knife. A plastic one maybe.
Post a Comment
<< Home